Waking up early in the morning for preparing tea-breakfast, preparing three-seater tiffin box for her husband Raghav, whom she married 2 years back, all while taking care of her toddler Ishaan, this was Shruti’s daily routine. This was followed by making preparations for the food for their in-laws, which was quite different based on their diet. She did have a maid, but also an attitude of vehemently monitoring each and every work to perfection. Amid all this, if she got some time, she would attend some online theatre workshops, her passion since childhood.

Not long ago, Shruti used to teach at primary school. It was only after she was 3-month pregnant with Ishaan, that she decided to take a break. 2 years into her marriage, Shruti was living a really happy life, one with no regrets.

CHAPTER 1

Shruti was cooking in the kitchen. Suddenly, Raghav barged in with Ishaan in his lap.

“Hey, how much time it will take you?”

“Half an hour, what happened?”

Angry Raghav slapped her hard, “Didn’t I tell you last night that I will have to leave early today, idiot!”

A totally baffled Shruti recalled that Raghav had said something like this when he came late last night, but she probably forgot it as she was herself in sleep.

“Bloody good for nothing, I’m leaving…shove this food on your face”.

Raghav put Ishaan in his playing area, kissed his forehead and rushed out of the house grabbing his stuff.

For about an hour, Shruti was totally lost, trying to process what happened. This was the first time, he had hit her. After finishing cooking and feeding Ishaan, she thumped her face on the pillow and started crying. A curious Ishaan stood beside her and then moved towards the drawer.

“Mamma, take this medicine”

Shruti looked at the medicine, and it was the same medicine she had given him a few days ago, when Ishaan got injured after falling down. Shruti again burst into tears and hugged Ishaan hard bringing him close to her.

FEW HOURS LATER

Raghav returned from office late at night. Shruti was already asleep by then.

He slowly sat beside her. Feeling his presence, Shruti said in low voice, “Your food is in kitchen, can eat”.

“Hey, sorry I forgot to tell you, I had the food in the office only, as our meeting went till quite late.”

Silence.

“Shruti…?”

“Yes”

“I’m very sorry for what I did in the morning. I know this is not how I should’ve behaved. Actually…I was just frustrated with my office stuff. Please forgive me…”

Silence.

“Hey Shruti come on…please…I’m sorry”

“Only on one condition.”

“What?”

“We will eat ice cream”

“OMG in this cold…OK fine, come on let’s have it. We have tonnes of it in the fridge”.

CHAPTER 2

8 AM

It was the breakfast time. Shruti was really excited as she made the special dish that Raghav liked, spending 2 bloody hours in the ventilator-less kitchen.

While Raghav was eating, she intentionally stayed a bit in background as she was anticipating him to cheer in excitement and then appreciate her.

“Shruti…”

The tone didn’t seem appreciating, but nonetheless she moved towards him.

“Yaar, what was this dish man! You still haven’t under understood the proper combination of spices. And haven’t I told you to mix it with potato for better taste”

“Raghav actually it was the first time, I prepared it on my own and I really worked hard for it…”

“Oh come on! Stop sounding like a child. It’s so unfortunate that you still haven’t learnt anything from my mother”

Shruti, who was left in utter disappointment still thought that maybe next time she would put in a better show.

9 AM

Raghav was all prepared to leave for the office, but just then he remembered something and turned.

“Hey Shruti…today onwards Maa will have her month-long puja. so, you need to prepare the five different types of food items for ‘prasadam’ before 10 am, understood. Since, it’s for the pooja, don’t let Chumki (maid) do it, prepare it yourself”.

“What??? Raghav you know I’m starting my theatre again, I’ve to go for that from 11 am. How will I be able to manage all that. Why don’t we hire someone who makes the prasad till Mummy Ji’s puja.”

“We can’t do that for the whole year”

“Whole year? You said it’s for a month, right?”

“No, actually…”

“Oh so you were lying? Raghav! I can’t manage all this forever. I told you I’ve to reconnect with my passion…hadn’t you promised me that you’ll always support me in my career”

“Hey, I don’t remember any such promise, and if you think that a man’s promise before marriage and a politician’s promise before elections are worth trusting, then the joke is on you! Focus on the pooja, that’s more important. From next year you’ll also be doing the day-long fast.”

“Raghav, what are you saying? You know I can’t stay hungry for the day, I was advised by the doctor not to stay hungry for long hours.”

“Listen carefully, I am tired of your excuses. You have to adopt each and every culture of this house, let it sink in your mind. You are a bahu of this respected family, so behave like that.”

“Raghav, but what about my theatre? I really want…”

“Shut up! OK, enough of it! I don’t care about your passion. All I have to say is that my Maa should have her prasad ready in time. It’s high time that you fully adopt our culture. I won’t repeat it and I don’t want any further discussion on the matter. Bye!”

Raghav banged the door and left for his office leaving Shruti tensed, trying to say something more, but to no avail.

11 AM

“Shruti…bring the ‘pedakiyas’, it’s time for the puja”

“Yes Maa ji, give me 5 mins,” a tired-as-hell Shruti said, as she pulled out the fifth set of today’s dish from the scorching oil.

All this while, she kept wondering when she had last eaten her favourite dishes, having completely reshaped her tastes to match those of Raghav’s family.

Meanwhile, her phone kept ringing. As Shruti peeped towards it. The screen read “5 MISSED CALLS – JASPREET THEATRE” 

CHAPTER 3

Shruti had found about Jaspreet’s theatre on social media. Looking at the type of plays they do, she got very excited and got herself enrolled for the workshop.

“Jaspreet sir, shall I leave for today.”

“Oh yes sure…oh no no wait”

“What happened sir?”

“Arey, you asked for those notes on Shakespeare, right?”

“Ahh, yes I remember”

“Actually, I’ll have to give you a brief explanation at the same time. We have the performance next week. Could you spare some extra 30 minutes?”

“OK sir, sure”

“And one more thing…please stop calling me ‘sir’, bahut shareef sa lagta hai (sounds too sobre), just call me Jaspreet”

“OK sir…I mean Jaspreet”

Both chukkled together.

PRESENT DAY

Tensed and nervous Shruti arrived at the theatre, knowing that

“Hey Shruti, why you didn’t show up for our play yesterday!” a furious Jaspreet emerged from his room.

Jaspreet, actually…”

“You know how difficult it was for us to find a replacement. We had to use a trainee girl, who is not that an expert, and neither had much time for preparation. As a result, our play was not at all good. Come on, I expected better from you”

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry Jaspreet…I…” and she started crying.

“Hey hey hey, stop crying, stop crying”

“I know I’m at fault…”

“OK OK, come inside,” and Jaspreet took her in the practice area.

FEW MINUTES LATER

“Shruti, actually I feel sorry after knowing what happened that day.”

No…why should you feel sorry. Maybe I shouldn’t have committed myself in this…”

“No, why not? It’s your life and you’re free to do what you want to. How can someone…I know it’s your personal life, but I can’t help saying what happened with you was wrong.”

Shruti nodded with a sad face.

“It’s fine, come on let’s grab some coffee from the cafe downstairs”

CHAPTER 4

“Hmm, so finally you remembered, you also have a house,” Raghav said, just as Shruti entered the house as the clock struck 7.

“What? Why are you talking like this Raghav? I had told you I’m going to see a friend, didn’t I?”

“Oh yes, I remember now” said Raghav with a little smirk

“Come on, you scared me!” Shruti was relieved

“By the way, what’s the name of your friend? Mrs Jaspreet?”

Tone death silence took over the room.

“Raghav, how do you…I mean what”

“You think I’m an idiot? So, not just you defy my instruction of NOT doing theatre, but now you are also running affairs”

“What? Raghav have you gone mad or what? There is nothing like this…we are just friends”

“Shut the f**k up, you bitch,” said a furious Ragahv, as he grabbed Shruti by her hair, leaving her in extreme pain, and slapped her very hard on her right ear and cheek. The pain was so extreme that Shruti couldn’t even utter a word.

“I decided to follow you today, and all my suspicion was absolutely right…my mom was right about you, I should keep a check on you. Raghav pulled her inside the room, opened his belt, and closed the doors.

Next morning, Shruti started her daily chores, business as usual. But, she was constantly feeling uneasiness in her right ear.

When people asked why she spoke so loudly, she replied, “The cold has hurt my ears a little.”

It was 1 AM in night. While waiting for Raghav to return, Shruti was half asleep on the sofa. Washing tonnes of clothes on washing machine, receiving (and serving) the unexpected guests and preparing the desired food in dinner, all this had taken a solid toll on her.

At around 2:30 AM, there is a ring at the door. “DING DONG”

Shruti breaks out of her sleep, peeps from the hole to confirm it’s Raghav, and opened the door.

Raghav entered, kept his stuff on the sofa and before Shruti could even have uttered a proper sentence, started kissing Shruti vigorously.

“Raghav…Raghav…wait,” a surprised Shruti said. “Take your food, it will get cold.”

Raghav nodded that he is not interested.

As Raghav was changing, Shruti came into the bedroom to set up the bed. Just as she was readying the pillow, two hands grabbed her from behind.

“Oh my god…Raghav you scared me,” she said, as Raghav strongly pressed her breasts and started kissing her on neck and cheeks. Then, he put his hands inside her nighty, attempting to take off her clothes.

“Hey Raghav, please stop, actually I’m very tired to…ahh”

Raghav further intensified his grip on her. He put her on the bed, and now started opening his pants.

“No no no Raghav, please listen to me…I’m very tired today, I’ve to also wake up early tomorrow…ahhh”

No heed was paid to Shruti’s concern as Raghav tore apart her nighty leaving her lying totally topless, and he trying to further pull down her pyjamas.

Shruti felt like extreme weight being put on her head, Suddenly, Raghav jumped up and grabbed both her hands and started kissing her breasts. He held her nipples with his teeth and hard pulled them, leaving Shruti in immense pain.

“Aaaah,” she screamed at the top of her voice. “Please leave, you’re hurting me…”

An aggrieved Raghav slapped her tight.

“Shut up, idiot. I’m loving you, can’t you see that? Now turn and let me do it properly”

A miserable Shruti had no option or power left than to comply with the diktat.

NEXT MORNING

“Shruti, where is the breakfast? I’m getting late for office”

Shruti had just woken up after a hell of a night. She looked at the time in her phone, and rushed out of the bed, before she realized being in immense pain and tried to manage herself to the kitchen.

“Give me 15 minutes”

CHAPTER 6

Today, a frustrated and nervous Shruti decided to confront Raghav. While, he was sitting with his parents, she took him into the room.

Their parents looked at each other in the creepiest manner, thinking they might become grandparents again.

“Raghav, things are not going as they should. My career has been thrown on road, I don’t even get the basic respect and I’m being treated just like a maid cum sex slave in this house.”

“What career you talking about, huh? That shitty teaching thing you did in that poor school, or that nautanki you were doing with your boyfriend, and what respect you were talking about? You stinky bitch! You have problem with me having sex with you, right? I don’t even want to touch you anymore. Your body is not even attractive.”

“Raghav, I didn’t say I have problem in having sex with you. But you have to ask me also, right…it’s about consent”

“Oh consent? When you got married to me, didn’t you give all your consent? I really regret the moment I made that decision of my life”

“RAGHAV… How dare you?” Shruti shouted in broken voice.

“Shut up, OK?” Raghav shouted back. “You’re a women and your voice should not go out of the house, remember that!” He pushed her back and went outside the room.

FEW MINUTES LATER

Raghav’s mother said, “What kind of a nature is this, beta? How can she shout so loudly being the women of this house, that too of this respected family? And what happened if my son got close to her or took out his frustration on her? After all, he comes after working hard whole day. What does she do except laying eggs here?”

Suddenly, his father too entered, “That’s what happens when your bahu is too educated. I had told you guys, let’s wait for some more time. But, no our honhaar beta (brilliant son) and her stupid mother were in hurry”

“But, what could I’ve done? I thought my son is around 30, he must be thinking ‘I must marry now’. And if he likes someone, let’s agree”

“Yes, and push the family’s peace and reputation, down the drain…And you mister, learn to control your wife if you decide to marry.”

Shruti, who was able to listen everything, was not able to believe what’s her worth in this family.

CHAPTER 7

PHONE RINGS

“Hello Mummy!”

“Hello beta, how are you?”

“Yes Mummy, good only”

“You sound very low, beta…is everything alright?”

“Ya Mummy it’s fine only. How all are you all, and Jimmy?”

“We are also fine. Jimmy misses you a lot, but is fine. I wonder why Raghav’s family objected to such a cute dog…How is your theatre stuff going?”

“Uhh, Mummy actually I’m not doing theatre for a month now”

“What? Why beta?

“Actually, Raghav and his parents had some issues with me going alone, working with other boys and all that”

“What??? This is very shocking. Did you not counter them? I mean, it was your passion, you always wanted to do it. And didn’t Raghav promise they’ll be supportive of your career?”

“Mummy…please, leave it. What all will I keep fighting for. Tell me?”

“What all? Beta, tell me what is going on. All this doesn’t sound right to me.”

“Mummy, it will take the whole day…”

“it’s ok, tell me, I am free to listen”

“Shut up Mummy, leave me alone”

CALL IS CUT

Shruti shut the phone and rushed to her room, while bursting into tears, as Ishaan stood in a corner looking at his mother in a miserable state.

CHAPTER 8

DING DONG

“Raghav, can you please see who’s at the door,” Shruti, whose hands were drenched in flour dough, said from the kitchen. “Maa ji, Papa ji…”

There was no response from anyone. While, Raghav pretended readying his office stuff, his parents-in-laws were busy in doing the morning pooja and reading newspapers respectively. With flour marks on cheeks, and apron on, Shruti went to open the door. What she saw had her jaw drop miles down.

Shruti saw her parents were standing at the door, right in front of her eyes. She didn’t know how to react.

“Mummy…Papa,” she shouted in surprise, excitement yet a bit of hesitation.

Suddenly, the pooja, newspaper and Raghav’s office preparation everything stopped, and they rushed outside to the hall.

Desperate and awkward Raghav went and greeted his parents-in-laws and asked them to get seated comfortably.

Few minutes after Shruti’s parents had arrived, Shruti asked Raghav, “Are you not getting late for the office?”

“Oh actually, I realized a bit late, today is second Saturday, so it’s an off. I’m not going today…Ha Ha”

“So Shruti,” her father asked, “At what time do you go for theatre, beta?”

“Papa…I told na…Mummy”

“What beta? I don’t know anything. You not doing theatre or what?” her father said, while her mother too made a clueless face.

“Yes Papa, actually Mummy ji and Papa ji…I mean Raghav asked me not to…”

“What???” her father said in the most surprising manner.

“Raghav, you asked Shruti to stop doing theatre?”

“Actually Daddy Ji…,” before Raghav could’ve finished, his mother intervened “Yes, samdhi ji, we asked her to stop, because the people around were making bad comments on us, and we can’t accept that. We come from a very respectable family”

“Yes Daddy ji, that’s the case”

“Beta…we also come from a respectable family, just so you know. Our daughter has been very good with her studies and actively did theatre throughout her life. So I don’t know what happened suddenly…”

“Papa, leave it, it’s OK…I mean I’m fine…” Shruti said as she moved closer to her father.

“Beta, being ‘fine’ is not enough. I didn’t brought you up just for that…oh wait…”

“What happened Papa?”

“What are these bruises on the back of your ears?”

“Nothing Papa, that’s some scratch maybe,” Shruti said as her hand went towards her ears.

“And what are these?” her father noticed the bruises on the lower part of her hand, which she was hiding till now.

“Papa…”

“How dare you?” he said, while staring at a panicked Raghav in the most dangerous fashion.

“What Daddy Ji?” he asked. Before he could’ve understood anything, his father-in-law slapped him hard, held him by his collars and shoved him right into the wall.

“Why did you hit my daughter?”

Raghav’s parents tried to stop him, but he let go of Raghav, only after Shruti intervened and asked his father to do so.

“Why are you behaving like this, there are times when a husband has to take some strong action to keep the wife’s control and save the family’s prestige,” Raghav’s father shouted, with his wife agreeing to it.

“I know, all this is pre-planned drama by Shruti. She has complained about me and that’s why they’ve dropped here suddenly to threaten me,” Raghav said.

“No Raghav, I didn’t say…” Shruti tried to intervene, but she was interrupted.

“What all did you complain about Shruti? Did you tell them about your affair? Did you tell them how inefficient you are as a bahu? And did you tell them about the rape allegations?” Raghav shouted.

“WHAT?” Shruti’s mother shouted in shock and held Shruti by her shoulders.

“Shruti, tell me the truth, all of it…NOW!”

CHAPTER 9

Shruti told her parents her real version of the marital rape incident and the affair allegation, and how her life has been since marriage. By the time her narration ended, she was totally in tears. Her mother held her and tried consoling while her father again gave a stern look to Raghav and his family. There was pin drop silence for some good 15 minutes.

Raghav’s father tried to pacify the situation, “See samdhi ji, these things happen in marriage. One should try to move forward taking the whole family together. If she has married our boy, she has already consented to adopting every culture and custom of our household and uphold all that works for our prestige and happiness. Also, isn’t it important that she doesn’t meet any other men alone, for the sake of the family’s reputation?”

“Samdhi ji,” Shruti’s father responded. “Thank you so much for your offer, but no my daughter hasn’t consented for any single thing that goes against her wishes, she will not change her personality to suit the self-proclaimed prestige of this family, and…you guys won’t decide who she will or will not meet. I’ve heard enough and I’m actually surprised how my daughter even survived here this long. But, not anymore.”

“What do you mean?” asked a surprised Raghav.

“Shruti is filing for a divorce,” Shruti’s mother said and put the papers on the table.

“What??? Are the three of you, totally out of your minds? At least think about your daughter’s future”

“We’ve very well decided about it, and that’s why we have taken this decision. Go Shruti, pack your stuff and once Ishaan is back from school, we will depart”

“Hey, you guys don’t even think about taking Ishaan’s custody”

Shruti’s father moved forward and handed him a phone number, saying, “Contact this lawyer for whatever concerns you have from now on…and get the fuck out of my daughter’s life. And don’t think we’re letting you go. We are filing the case for domestic violence and abuse, so the next conversation will happen in court”

FEW HOURS LATER

Just when Shruti, along with Ishaan was moving out, they overheard Raghav’s parents saying “You should not give any alimony, they didn’t even give us a dowry”. They added, “Arey, the whole society will spit on you their face for bringing a married daughter back home, just see.”

Shruti’s father moved back and said, “My daughter is independent and self-sufficient. And she is moving out of this toxic hell for a better life. And in any worst case, we’re standing like a wall for her. So, take your alimony and shove it up your misogynist ass”.

Shruti, who was both emotional and proud at her parents, went into their car with Ishaan and they all departed to her old home in search of a new life, where Shruti’s pet dog Jimmy keenly awaited her.

CHAPTER 10

On a cozy winter morning, Raghav was in his college library searching for some notes ahead of the exam next week. While going through the books, his eyes fell on an ethereal girl, who was quietly studying in a corner. For some good 5 minutes, Raghav got totally lost in a different world. After gathering some courage, he went to girl named Shruti asking about her course. He showed interest when he got to know she is a theatre artist, and they started discussing art and cinema notes, and they started discussing about art and cinema. Raghav said he is very fond of theatre actors and loves art cinema, which impressed Shruti. Following their conversation, they went to the canteen. Soon, Shruti and Raghav started liking each other, and the nearby park became their go to spot for meeting.

6 MONTHS LATER

“I love you Shruti,” said Raghav, while holding her hands and keeping his head on the lap.

“Raghav, I also like you a lot,” Shruti said while in his eyes

“Shruti, both of us like each other. You know I am a good and settled person. Should we get married?”

“Raghav, you know I absolutely want to…but I’m a bit confused as I also want to focus on my career as theatre artist

“Then focus, who is stopping you? You like teaching kids, you also like to do theatre. Then keep doing it. But, please please, I don’t have words to tell you, how much you mean to me”

“But, you know the commitment of marriage, right? If I get into that, how will manage all these. Your parents will…”

“You don’t need to worry about all that. Coming from a very humble and struggling background, my parents are the most progressive ones I’ve ever seen. And I can assure you of all the support you need in your career even after marriage. Please Shruti…” said Raghav staring at her with his deep and emotive eyes.

“OK, but no dowry and you’ll have to meet my parents tomorrow”

EPILOGUE

Today, I’m very proud of myself. I teach kids in the nearby school in the morning and go for my theatre in the evening. Ishaan has also settled in quite well now. Initially, it was difficult for him also, but slowly he is understanding the whole scenario. Raghav hasn’t called Ishaan since the night he confronted him over the phone for what all he did to me. After our formal divorce and the legal case, Raghav was handed hefty fine, but no jail sentence. By the way, I’ve given some solid performances in theatre now, even Jaspreet is very happy with it. Mom and dad are ageing but are still good at health.  I’m still surprised how they understood the whole situation on their own and took the bold stand to take out of that hell. Knowingly or unknowingly, I had normalized all that transpired there. Maybe I never would’ve got the courage to take this bold step. So many women in this country get trapped in a toxic marriage, with abuses, marital rape and even violence at times, being a part of their daily routine. I wonder how many parents in this country are able to show this courage. Grateful to you, mom and dad. I hope more daughters are able to get this support from their parents, who just consider their daughters as a ‘responsibility’ that has to be married off.

–Shruti